What I Wish I Knew Before Leaving Medicine: The Power of Values and Integrity
In this post, I continue my series on “Things I Wish I Knew Before Quitting Medicine.” Today’s topic may resonate far beyond the world of healthcare: values and integrity.
This is no longer just a conversation about physician burnout—it’s about the spiritual crisis unfolding in our workplaces, and in our world.
From Burnout to Breakthrough: A Story
My journey into burnout didn’t begin with exhaustion—it began with a moral conflict.
I remember the exact moment it started. I had always loved oncology, inspired by my mother’s cancer diagnosis when I was 19. Though my vocation may have stemmed from unresolved grief, I was genuinely committed to alleviating pain and suffering.
One day, a practice accountant informed me that my salary was being cut. Why? Because I was “less productive” than a colleague. He showed me the numbers: my partner generated twice as much revenue, despite seeing only slightly more patients. The reason? He administered more chemotherapy—which brought in more money.
That conversation unsettled me deeply, even if I couldn’t articulate why. I realized that my income now depended on patients being sick enough to need chemo—not on healing. This shift planted a seed of doubt that would grow into full-blown burnout.
Over time, I noticed disturbing patterns—patients being pushed into aggressive treatments, not always because it was best for them, but because it was financially incentivized. I saw elderly patients with incurable cancers being treated aggressively, when hospice might have offered more peace and dignity. I saw advanced cases where hospice might have been the kinder path, yet chemo continued.
Then came my own cancer diagnosis. Having experienced the brutality of chemo firsthand, I could no longer prescribe it unless it was absolutely necessary. The disconnect between what I valued and what I was expected to do became unbearable.
That was the moment I knew my career in medicine—as I had known it—was over.
Integrity: The Missing Piece
Looking back, I wish I’d recognized this internal conflict earlier. But I didn’t have the language for what I was feeling.
So, let’s talk about that language.
What is integrity?
Integrity can mean many things—excellence, ethics, responsibility. But perhaps its deepest meaning is spiritual alignment. For me, it means doing the right thing, even when it’s inconvenient. It means showing up fully, acting with the right intentions, and staying connected to my truth.
Whether you call it ethics, faith, or simply the golden rule, integrity is a powerful force. And its rewards are tangible.
The Rewards of Living with Integrity
1️⃣ Peace of Mind
Integrity creates inner peace (and, therefore, joy), by aligning your actions with your conscience. It’s the antidote to guilt, shame, and self-doubt.
My coaching clients often blame themselves when outcomes are less than ideal. I teach them this: if you had loving intentions and acted with integrity, there’s nothing to regret. You did enough.
2️⃣ Unshakable Confidence
When you’re anchored in your values, you become more persuasive, more grounded, and less susceptible to external pressure. You stop needing to prove yourself—your conviction speaks for itself.
This is particularly helpful in negotiations, leadership, or legal matters. When you know you’re doing the right thing, your influence grows, and you naturally repel manipulation and pressure.
3️⃣ Freedom from Impostor Syndrome
Integrity dissolves impostor syndrome. When your focus is on service, not status, your worth isn’t tied to external validation. Success becomes about impact, not income. It becomes about staying true to ourselves.
Reflection: What Are Your Values?
I invite you to ask yourself:
Have you ever silenced your inner voice when something felt wrong?
Do you have your own clear definition of integrity?
What are your core values—and are you living in alignment with them?
Stay tuned for the next videos in the series “What I Wish I Knew Before Quitting Medicine,” where I’ll dive deeper into the most critical mistakes I made and now teach my clients to avoid.
Final Thoughts
The crisis of burnout is not just a healthcare problem—it’s a values problem. A spiritual disconnect. A loss of alignment with integrity.
Reclaiming your values is not only healing—it’s transformative.
If you’d like help clarifying your values or navigating a path forward that feels aligned, I’m here. You don’t have to do it alone.
With love,
Diely Pichardo-Johansson, MD
Mindset Coach | Author | Cancer Survivor
Let’s talk!
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